we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
