Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one. http://tfl.nu/00mh
  Replies (4) Good night (1497) Bad night (1928)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time http://tfl.nu/uesv
  Replies (8) Good night (1041) Bad night (5246)
• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (916): Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool? http://tfl.nu/8wpx
  Replies (15) Good night (6670) Bad night (1471)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before. http://tfl.nu/yrqt
  Replies (82) Good night (9311) Bad night (1199)
• Favorite

  (417): View more from Missouri

  I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (417): I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked http://tfl.nu/4oxw
  Replies (6) Good night (3719) Bad night (820)
• Favorite

  (281): View more from Texas

  Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (281): Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes. http://tfl.nu/y77d
  Replies (11) Good night (878) Bad night (4087)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (402): I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise. http://tfl.nu/i6qg
  Replies (6) Good night (3258) Bad night (887)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (615): You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea. http://tfl.nu/dzpq
  Replies (4) Good night (1124) Bad night (4020)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (214): Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this? http://tfl.nu/6xbx
  Replies (7) Good night (1671) Bad night (988)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year. http://tfl.nu/exle
  Replies (16) Good night (3125) Bad night (1150)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon http://tfl.nu/yvmd
  Replies (15) Good night (1906) Bad night (634)
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (740): Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome. http://tfl.nu/z77p
  Replies (2) Good night (1354) Bad night (457)
• Favorite

  (323): View more from California

  but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (323): but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA" http://tfl.nu/kezs
  Replies (2) Good night (667) Bad night (343)
• Favorite

  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (306): I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks http://tfl.nu/ndt4
  Replies (10) Good night (797) Bad night (383)
• Favorite

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (717): The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment. http://tfl.nu/qpzk
  Replies (1) Good night (287) Bad night (152)

Randomize