sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Randomize
