You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize