They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
