I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
