it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Randomize
