Dual....:-)
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize