'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
Mom said you looked used
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
Randomize
