she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
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