is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
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