Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
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your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
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The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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