i already hear my dad disowning me
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
