I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Randomize