omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
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i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
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I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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