Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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