I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Randomize
