Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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