Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
I can't trust your balls anymore.
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
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