My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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