You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
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