Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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