I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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