The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
