Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize