Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
I look excited, but its just a facade.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
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