and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Randomize