Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Randomize
