Define "chronic" masturbator.
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize