In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
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