I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Randomize