Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
no you cant smoke seaweed
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Randomize