She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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