What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
