was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
only if we run a train.
done.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Randomize
