i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
I went to an adult Halloween party last night dressed as Mrs. Doubtfire, but I woke up on a stranger's couch surrounded by sleeping children in karate gi's. And I accidentally flushed my granny wig mid-puke, so if they wake up I'm gonna have to convince them that I'm just a weird older man and not a terrible cross dresser.
How did you come to this point in your life?
Good bartenders.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize