i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Randomize
