just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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