The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I need a beard to bite.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
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