Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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