also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize