I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
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