Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
