He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
