i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Well I just put wine in my tea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
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