I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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