Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
