don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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