WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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