How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
